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"Tricks or Treats: Scare vs Share"
written by Fred Passmore
copyight 2003

Note: Offering an alternative to ignoring Halloween, this skit also makes a great addition to the annual Harvest Festival events at your church. Not endorsing the holiday, but acknowledging it and suggesting that it be used to witness, it can add some seasonal fun to your event and give some ideas at the same time. (Please don't write informing me all about the evils of Halloween, I am well aware of all the arguments. But many churches have Halloween-type events, or alternative events, and this skit is for those comfortable using it.)

Setting: a family's living room on Halloween evening. Some candles may be lit, and a pumpkin may sit by the door on the table where the candy dish is.

Characters: Husband and wife Karen and Howard, elderly next-door neighbor Mrs. Snelling, five or six trick or treating kids in costume, and Stuart, who is a neighbor in costume.

Costumes: As many kids Halloween costumes as you have kids in the skit, plus one scary adult costume for Stuart. Also a fright mask for use by Howard.

Props: big bowl of candy, stack of tracts or booklets. Note: For an extra touch, light a pumpkin-pie scented candle on stage before the skit and let the aroma permeate the area to simulate the smell of the "baking pie" the dialogue refers to.

"Tricks or Treats: Scare vs Share"

(If you are using the Supplemental Skit Trax CD, begin Track #28, the cute but creepy skit open music. It ends with the first doorbell ring.)

(The wife enters with a bowl of candy and gospel tracts.)

Karen: "Boy, we're having a lot of kids this year!" (She opens the door and there are two small children in costumes.)

Kids: "Trick or treat!"

Karen: "Oh my goodness, who could these little people be?"

Kid 1: "We're the Anderson kids, from across the street!"

Kid 2: "You didn't know it was us, did you, Mrs. Brown?"

Karen: "I sure didn't, what great disguises!"

Kids: "Thanks! Our mom helped us!"

Karen: "Well, she did a great job. (Taking some candy from the bowl, she drops some in their bags.) Here's some candy, kids... (She holds up a tract.) ...and some fun little booklets for you to read later!" (She drops them in the bag also.)

Kids: "Thank you!" (They run off.)

Karen: (Closing the door.) "Good thing I bought some extra candy. (Calling to the next room.) Honey, the kids are hitting us heavy tonight, why don't you get the door a few minutes while I check on the pumpkin pie?"

Howard: (From the next room.) "I'll be right there!"

Karen: (As she leaves the room.) "The candy and Gospel tracts are on the table beside the door!"

(A moment after she leaves, Howard comes in, carrying on a scary mask.)

Howard: "Heh, heh, this will put a fright into those little monsters! (He puts it over his head.) I'm ready for ya, kids."

(Play Track #29: Doorbell rings. USE THIS TRACK FOR EACH DOORBELL RING NEEDED!)

Howard: "Aha, my first victims!"

(Howard opens the door from behind so that the kids cannot see him.)

Kids: (Together.) "Trick or treat!!!"

(Howard jumps from behind the door, with arms raised and yelling.)

Howard: "BOO!"

(The several kids scream, tossing their candy bags, and run away in terror.)

Howard: (Closing the door, and laughing.) "Oh, that was priceless! This is too much fun. But they forgot to get their candy! Oh, well, more left for me." (He pulls the mask up off of his face, and opens a piece of candy from the bowl. As he eats it, he looks at one of the Gospel tracts.)

(Play Track #29 AGAIN: Doorbell rings.)

Howard: (Pulling the mask back down.) "Heh, heh, more already!"

(Howard yanks the door open, raises his arms, and roars.)

Howard: "RAAAAARGGGH!

(Instead of being more kids, standing in the door is next-door neighbor Mrs. Snelling!)

Mrs. Snelling: (Recoiling backwards with a scream.) "AAAAAGHHH!"

Howard: (Quickly pulling off the mask, he apologises.) "Mrs. Snelling! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you, I thought you were more trick-or-treaters."

Mrs. Snelling: (Holding her chest and gasping for breath.) "Good heavens!"

Karen: (Hurrying into the room.) "What's happening in here?"

(Howard is holding Mrs. Snelling's arm and helping her to a chair as she hyperventilates.)

Mrs. Snelling: (Yanking her arm away from him and shooting him a nasty look.) "Your husband nearly frightened the life out of me just now!"

Karen: (Accusingly.) "Howard! How could you?"

Howard: (Contritely.) "I didn't know it was her, I thought it was just some more kids!"

Mrs. Snelling: (Indignantly.) "As if that's any excuse! You shouldn't be trying to scare innocent children, anyway."

Karen: (Pointedly.) "That's right, Howard."

Howard: (Shrugging.) "Hey, it's Halloween! It goes with the territory. The kids like it!"

Karen: (Shooting him a look, she turns to Mrs. Snelling.) "I'm so sorry about this. How can I help you, Mrs. Snelling?"

Mrs. Snelling: "I got tired of listening to all those kids knocking at my door. I left the light off, but they still come! I just ignore them, but then they egg my house! I thought if I just got out and turned off all the lights, they wouldn't bother knocking at all. So I came to visit. (She looks darkly at Howard.) But I can see things are just as upsetting over here!"

(Howard grins weakly.)

Karen: "They're usually not, I promise."

Mrs. Snelling: I thought you two were Christians, why do you participate in all this by encouraging the kids to come beg for candy at your door?"

Karen: "Well, apart from Howard's over-enthusiasm..."

Howard: (Defensively.) "Hey, I grew up doing it and it never hurt me! I turned out normal."

Mrs. Snelling: (Doubtfully.) "Oh, really?"

(They shoot looks at each other.)

Karen: "Anyway, aside from that, I don't want to be anti-social and turn off the lights, when it's a golden opportunity to give with the candy a gospel tract. It's the one time of the year when kids come to our door, and I wouldn't miss it for anything. The neighbors all know me, and I'd hate for them to think my religion makes me so uptight that I can't give their kids a little candy. Then they take home a gospel tract that probably everyone in the family will end up reading!"

Mrs. Snelling: (A light seems to dawn.) "Why, I hadn't thought of that. What a wonderful idea!"

Karen: "Well, the kids are coming anyway, why not also give them -with some candy and a smile- something that could be a treat for all eternity, instead of a cold shoulder and an unfriendly dark porch?"

Mrs. Snelling: (Standing up to leave.) "I think I'll do it. It beats an egged house, too. But I don't have any tracts to give them this year."

Karen: (Picking up a handful of tracts.) "Please, Mrs. Snelling, take some of ours, we have plenty!"

Mrs. Snelling: (Smiling, she takes them.) "Thanks, Karen. And please, call me Grace."

Karen: (Opening the door for her as she leaves.) Thanks, Grace! Come over anytime and visit."

Mrs. Snelling: (Turning to look pointedly at Howard as she pauses in the door.) "I will, if he doesn't answer the door like last time!"

(Howard grins sheepishly.)

Karen: "He won't, I promise!" (She closes the door with a smile, then loses it as she turns to look at Howard disapprovingly.)

Howard: (Holding up his hands.) "Hey, it was an innocent mistake! Besides, she scared me almost as much as I scared her! One more facelift and that old biddy's face will disappear into her hairline!"

Karen: (Hands on her hips.) "Howard! That's unkind. You're really on a roll tonight. She's a sweet lady once you get to know her."

Howard: "Yeah, I'll bet they said the same thing about the Wicked Witch of the West, too."

Karen: "Howard!"

Howard: "Just kidding! Go, tend to your pie. I'll get the door, and I'll hand out the candy and tracts."

Karen: "Alright, then. It's just about ready to come out of the oven!"

(She turns to go, and as she does, Howard starts to put on the mask. She suddenly spins and points at him, making him start guiltily.)

Karen: "And no mask! You'll frighten the kids away and they won't take the tracts then!"

Howard: (Disappointedly lowering the mask.) "Oh, honey! A little harmless scare never hurt anybody!"

Karen: "Be careful, those words may come back to haunt you! Besides, if you do, there'll be no hot pumpkin pie with whipped cream for you! I'll take it over to Mrs. Snelling and we'll eat it. Or better yet, I'll take it to Stuart. He'll eat it in one sitting!"

Howard: "Ouch! You really know how to threaten a guy. All right, no scary stuff."

(Karen leaves the room and Howard looks at the mask.)

Howard: (To the mask.) "I still say it doesn't hurt anything." (Moving the mouth of the mask with his hand inside, he makes it answer him back in a gravelly voice.) "You said it, buddy!"

(Play Track #29 AGAIN: Doorbell rings.)

Howard: (Tossing aside the mask, he picks up the candy bowl and the tracts.) "Just a minute!"

(He opens the door but there is no-one there. He looks around, but no kids.)

Howard: "Huh? Where are they at? (He shrugs his shoulders and turns to come back in.) Oh, well, guess they couldn't wait."

(Play Track #30: Stuart's Prank attack music.)

(SUDDENLY a masked figure in a monster costume lunges through the door behind him and GRABS Howard by the shoulders!)

Monster: (Deep and threateningly.) "GIVE ME THAT CANDY!"

(Howard screams shrilly and tosses the candy bowl, with treats flying everywhere! He tries to get away and trips, falling on the floor and recoiling in terror. The intruder jumps back, yanking off the mask and hooting with uproarious laughter. It is their other neighbor, Stuart.)

Stuart: (shouting.) Happy Halloween! (Laughing with glee, bending over with his hands on his knees.) "Haw, haw, haw! I got you good, Howie, you should have seen your face!"

Howard: (Jumping up in anger.) "STUART! You jerk! You could have given me a heart attack!"

Stuart: (Wiping his eyes and giggling.) "Oh, that was priceless. I wish I could have filmed it, it would have won on "Funniest Home Videos!"

(Karen has run into the room, fearing the worst, but then sees what has happened. She smiles at the sight of Howard panting to catch his breath, and laughs along with Stuart.)

Karen: (Pointing at Howard and laughing.) "Hey, Howie, looks like you reaped what you sowed!"

Stuart: "He screamed like the Devil himself was after him!"

Karen: "Well, maybe you scared the devil out of him, and he sure needed that!"

(Howard, getting over the fright, begins to smile and finally laugh also, at himself.)

Howard: "I guess I did have that coming. But I didn't expect it so soon!"

Karen: (Bending down to pick up the candy.) "Well, payback usually comes when you least expect it."

Howard: "I learned my lesson, for sure."

(SFX: The doorbell rings or there is a knock.)

Howard: (Bending over to help.) Let me do this, honey, I want to make up for scaring off the last little visitors. I'll make sure they get the tracts, too!"

Stuart: (Sniffing the air loudly.) "Hey, something s-u-u-u-ure smells good in here! Is that pumpkin pie?"

Karen: (Standing, she puts her arm in his.) "It sure is, Stuart! Why don't you come in the kitchen and I'll cut you a bi-i-i-ig slice of it."

Stuart: (Claps his hands together in anticipation.) "Sounds great! I'm starved."

Howard: (Protesting.) "But... but... I want some pie, too!"

Karen: (Tauntingly, as they go through the door.) "Better answer that door, honey! It sounds like a big crowd this time."

(He opens the door and is mobbed by a group of kids yelling "Trick or treat!!!" He hands out the candy and tracts to them all, worriedly looking back at the kitchen door.)

Howard: (Desperately.) "Stuart! Karen! You better save me some of that pie! I mean it! Stuaaaaaart!"

Stuart: (offtstage.) "Hey, Howie! The pie is about gone!"

(Howard finally has treated them all and closes the door, hurrying offstage towards the kitchen.)

Howard: (As he exits.) Stop it, Stuart! You're really scaring me now!

(Play Track #31, the creepy Close Music.)

END

(Inform me of your intention to use this script, or tell me what you thought of it, by going to the Contact Fred page of this site.)

For some great tracts to hand out, visit The American Tract Society at www.atstracts.org.
Here's a radio program by the The American Tract Society that addresses this type of Halloween Outreach. Listen!

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